We commonly grow up with the idea of a romantic relationship as the one made of two people. But what if three (or more) were actually the magic number?
A romantic relationship which involves more than two people is generally hard to accept. Why? Simply because we grew up in a monogamy-centred society where the fairy-tale notion of “the one” prevails love in its other forms.
On the other side, “polyamory” or a “non-monogamy” relationship breaks the traditions and proposes to love, and be intimate with not only one, but more people. We commonly grow up with the idea of a romantic relationship as the one made of two people who are committed exclusively to each other. Not surprisingly, accepting multiple intimate relationship simultaneously becomes a concept a bit hard to accept. Although multiple relationships are quite common in the UK, the concept remains still hard to understand. Without blaming anyone, being polyamorous is a quite complex and broad concept. Because of this we have decided to write this article and clarify any doubts and misunderstanding around the non-monogamous relationships.
So, what is a polyamory relationship?
On a basic level, a polyamory relationship is “The practice of having multiple romantic and sexual relationships simultaneously”. Despite the misconceptions, being in a non-monogamous relationship is more than sleeping around or having orgies with random.
All you need is love!
First of all, polyamory is about love. In fact, the word is a combination of Greek and Latin and means “to love many”. Loving more than one person and being happy when they are in love with others and vice versa is at the basis of this type of relationship.
Still confused ha? We don’t blame you. Let’s see in more in detail…
Polyamory is about consent and agreement
What most people miss when it comes to this sort of relationships, is that like any monogamous relationship, polyamory do have terms and conditions without which it would be nothing but cheating! A polyamorous relationship is, in fact, about consent and agreement. This means that each person involved must be aware of the other people’s present and must agree and most importantly be happy about them!
They are excellent communicators
A good habit for a healthy relationship is communication. And communication is something polyamory people are really good at! There are open about their feeling and have no secrets that could hurt the other person. This makes it possible for them to avoid misunderstanding, to be honest and live a happy relationship.
What a Polyamory relationship is NOT:
Now that you know what it is like to be in a polyamory relationship, let’s see what it is NOT and bring down some of the misconceptions around it!
They do not fear commitment
Because polyamory is the opposite of the monogamous relationship when it comes to commitment, it is often biased that they do it as an excuse to avoid commitment. Wrong!
A polyamorous relationship is about commitment. And if you see it with different eyes, they are more committed than couples in a monogamous relationship.
They have sex with everyone
Just because the allow each other to be intimate with other people it does not mean that they would have sex with random people. Being Polyamory is about connection, and when that connection is missing there is no reason for the individual to go further and have sex.
They do not get jealous
Although they allow each other to be in multiple relationships simultaneously, they still can get jealous. This bring us back to the ‘terms and conditions of the relationship’ mentioned above. In case partners have not established the ground rules for their relationships, it becomes really easy to feel jealousy and resentment towards another partner. This explains why, it is fundamental to define each one’s role in the relationship and make sure everyone is agreed, in order to enjoy a loving polyamorous relationship all together.