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Despite a messy breakup that left you heart broken, are you struggling to close that book? Here are the three key steps to winning back your ex and reclaiming what you once had. Be careful though, if the relationship is doomed to fail, some things are best left in the past… <\/span><\/p>\n A breakup always brings suffering in a relationship, and some simply aren\u2019t fixable. However, that doesn\u2019t mean that hope is always lost. <\/span><\/p>\n Step 1: If you\u2019re under him, you ain\u2019t getting over him<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n After a break, the temptation to call or text is huge. Don\u2019t do this. Bot of you need some space to self-reflect and learn what went wrong in the relationship. Cut off communication – don\u2019t specifically block them on all your social media accounts (leave them a way to reach out to you), but don\u2019t make contact or respond for about three weeks. After this time you should know what went wrong and how you can fix things up. <\/span><\/p>\n Silence has unsuspected virtues. It helps you to become more aware of things and to question yourself. What went wrong? How can you prevent this in the future? What was the relationship lacking? Take some time to mull these over. <\/span><\/p>\n Step 2: The post-dating messaging strategy<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n After these three weeks, you can go ahead and reach out. Keep things light hearted and don;t mention the breakup if you can help it. Don\u2019t say \u201cI\u2019ve really missed you\u201d or \u201cWhen can I see you next\u201d, instead make casual conversation. A good example is \u201cI just saw your neighbour in town\u201d, \u201cFinally caught up with Game of Thrones\u201d, or a light-hearted meme. Your aim here is to prompt them to remember sweet and happy moments from the relationship, and avoid any heavy, embarrassing conversations. <\/span><\/p>\n